Geek Confession: Am I Even A Geek??

Gee, it’s been a long time since I’ve done a geek confession, but here we are. This past week, a few of the guys on Twitter were discussing what exactly constitutes a “geek” or “nerd” and how that relates to Dungeons and Dragons, and other fantasy media. Now, I always used to think of myself as one of those things; I’m rather passionate about the natural sciences, I’ve never been particularly interested in or good at sports, I like fantasy and science fiction, and I’m not much of a “ladies man”. But after reading that thread on Twitter, I’m beginning to wonder if I’m even a geek at all.

Jesse White, defined “nerd” as “a science person with bad-breath and head-gear braces.” He further elaborated that “More generally, it's psychology not pastime. Nerds live a 10/90 relation where 10% is focused on normal behaviour & 90 is on some obsession. You may make a case that such ppl can be drawn to computers and D&D, but it's a superficial relationship.”

Was I such a kid? I was homeschooled, which was considered very strange for where I grew up, but that wasn’t exactly up to me. I was more than a little socially awkward; I liked being around other kids, but I don’t think they ever really understood me. I had a few obsessions, yes, but those didn’t necessarily come at the expense of normal behavior. I acted normal enough for the people I associated with. In fact more normal than many of the other homeschooled kids I knew. Assessing myself now, it was probably a 40/60 relationship, where 60% was weird obsession and 40% was normal behavior. That changed when I was about 13, and it was more like 50/50.

In Jesse’s day (he’s a Gen X, so think early 80s) things like Star Wars and Dungeons and Dragons were not considered “geek” occupations. Lots of kids played DnD and read fantasy books, regardless of their social standing, or whether or not they were considered “nerds” or “geeks”. This was pretty much the same in the 90’s when I grew up. Lots of kids I knew read Harry Potter, none of them were nerds or geeks. Except the ones that are still obsessed with it despite being grown adults, but that’s a topic for another time.

These were just regular kids. They played sports, they listened to heavy metal, they went on dates; and they watched fantasy movies and played DnD. one of the other guys in this thread said:

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Everyone I played with when growing up was metal head weightlifters. When we did play with ‘nerds’ they were so cringey we never asked them back again. I never experienced anything close to modern ‘nerdom’ or any other geekiness.

— Oghma (@Oghma_EM) May 30, 2021

As you can see, the culture has shifted a lot in the past 30 years. Would I have been welcome at his game? Maybe. 

When I’ve encountered geeks according to Jesse’s definition, I’ve been a little repulsed. It seemed like their obsessions came at the expense of their own health and wellbeing. They’d sit around playing video games and eating junk food and spending almost no time outdoors. Now, most of you know that I keep myself in shape, and I do love spending time out in nature. To my mind, why would you spend hours indoors playing pokemon when you could be hiking? It made very little sense to me. 

Furthermore, as I got older, I started taking better care of myself and actively trying to improve physically and mentally; I took karate classes, I started building muscle, I’ve tried to improve my social skills. I’m still very interested in fantasy and sci-fi media (why do you think this blog exists?) but not to the extent that it affects everything else in my life.

So am I still a geek? I don’t know. You tell me.